Thursday, January 22, 2009

My miracle

Joshua is still the same....well to a point. Stable but feisty! He keeps fighting sedation they are really having to hit him with the meds. He would rather be awake and loving on everyone than just lying there in bed.
After having lunch with my mom we returned to the room. I was up close to Joshua talking to him and telling him how strong he was and how much he was loved. He opened his eyes and was able to fix them on me. (After all the swelling just opening them has been a feat but with all the sedation when he did open them but he kind of looked like no one was home.) I got close so he could see me and told him that I loved him as big as the sky and that he was going to owe me 15o when he was better. (This is something that I have told him since he was little and on the vent this summer. I couldn't get into to kiss his lips so I would tell him that when he was off the vent he would owe me 150....meaning kisses. I have always done this with him and now that he is bigger I tell him I want a 150 and we pucker up and make as many smacking noises as we can. Things we do with our kids....right?) So my miracle.....with his little eyes open and fixed on him he "blew me a kiss" Joshua style. (He doesn't use his hands he just puckers with all he has and makes the noises!) I think my heart stopped. I felt the urge to hold back the surge of emotions that I felt overcoming me because of the fear of not being able to stop sobbing if I started!
So tonight I am thankful to the Lord not only for Joshua, his new angel heart and all the other awesome miracles and blessing in my life but for proving to me that despite the big scary ECMO machine....my baby is in there and is ok.

8 comments:

Joshua said...

My little Joshua....Kaitlin and Karen came up to see you today. It makes my heart feel good that all these wonderful people are so in love with you that they come to check on you and worry about you. They even worry about you when they go home to be with their families. I know that the care you are receiving is stellar because all of these people really care about you. Love, Mommy

BBH said...

Leah,
You sure know how to bring a tear to someone's eye :0)
This is amazing news! I can't even begin to think of the wave of feelings that must have rushed through you when little Joshua "puckered up". What a sweetheart.

Cindy

Anonymous said...

I'm so happy for you, it is such a great feeling to see progression instead of just sitting in limbo. You call me whenever you need....miles away but still close in mind and heart. Love you guys!

Darla

Anonymous said...

Leah, I met you last Sunday when I was visiting Claire, who shared a room with Joshua.
I came home just praying like crazy for Joshua. I called my brother and told him to start praying and now my bible study is praying. I was thrilled when Tracy told me Joshua was getting a new heart. Praise the Lord! We are praying harder now. He is always on my mind.
Thank you so much for this blog. I know we don't always get to know the answers to our prayers but sometimes it is just nice to see them.
God Bless you, Joshua and your entire family.
Lois

Lindsay Dean said...

Leah~
We are a heart family in Michigan and we became aware of you through Angie Hand. My daughter, Lindsay, is currently on the transplant list at U of M and Angie just wanted to spread the good news of Joshua's new angel heart and the fact that he was also 95% sensitized! What a miracle and we couldn't be happioer for you! We are praying so hard that he does well and that his new heart will learn to love it's new enviornment. We will pray for you continuously and know that you have fans pulling for him in Michigan!
Heart Blessings~
Suzie Dean
www.lindsaysheart.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

Leah,
I've told you before and your blogs prove the fact that God chose you special to be Joshua's mom. He couldn't have made a better choice! Sneak a kiss in for Aunt Jackie if you can spare one. :D
Love you tons!

Jackie

Joshua said...

Lizzy, Nicole and Kara came up to see you tonight. Erma thinks that I should get you a notebook for all the nurses to write you messages. I think I will do this. She also said it will be in handy for when you really act up....you can pick a friend from your book to come and save you from me. We agreed that there would be several takers. We will see how that all pans out when you are a teen ager! :) I love you peanut.
Mommy.

Joshua said...

Lizzy, Nicole and Kara came up to see you tonight. Erma thinks that I should get you a notebook for all the nurses to write you messages. I think I will do this. She also said it will be in handy for when you really act up....you can pick a friend from your book to come and save you from me. We agreed that there would be several takers. We will see how that all pans out when you are a teen ager! :) I love you peanut.
Mommy.